Possible breakthrough?

The number one biggest fear of all people is public speaking. Why do we get all flustered and nervous at the mere mention of the subject? I had to do a presentation in my Human Sexuality class this evening, and it made me think about public speaking and why we get all freaked out over it. We've had to do oral presentations since the beginning of the first grade. At one point each of us is going to have to stand up and tell everyone our name, where we're from and our favourite colour. This is inevitable. Why don't we get used to it and how come it doesn't get easier?? Do most people get nervous at the thought of screwing up and looking stupid, or are they concerned about being judged by their peers?

I like to think of myself as a rather chill, go-with-the-flow, shit happens sometimes, kind of person. Whenever I have to get in front of a group of people and speak, I feel completely calm because I know this is something that I have to do, so I'd better just deal with it and get on with my life. But for some reason, as soon as I get out there in front of the room, lights shining down, all eyes on me, my body suddenly says, "What the hell?!? What are you doing in front of these people!? Get out of there! Run you bloody moron, run!" This is the point in which my vocal cords tighten and my voice gets that horrible waver that is distinctive to only those who are public speaking. Why does my body suddenly switch to panic mode at the very last second??? The human body is very confusing sometimes. But, I would like to say that the presentation went astonishingly well. My professor in that class makes the atmosphere so comfortable and uninhibited that by the end of the presentation I was talking with the class as though I'd known them for years. Sure I forgot to say a couple things (my mind went completely blank when trying to think of the word fertilization), but still I think the experience may have been a public speaking break-through in my life. I certainly hope so anyway.

Tip of the day: Sex may last a minute, but herpes lasts a lifetime. Wear a condom people.

There is this new noise in my room that comes from the wall which has my window. I was going to call it my "far wall with the window"but then I started to laugh at the thought of using that description of my room. If anyone has ever seem my room, they would know that my room is smaller than a prison cell and to claim that I have a "far wall" is completely absurd. Anyway, the noise sounds like there is something scratching along the inside of the wall. I honestly thought that there was a rodent or some kind of creature in my room last night as I layed here listening to the sound move across the room, about two feet from my bed. A 2am lights on search came up with no evidence, so perhaps there is something in the walls?? I'm not a fan of the thought of this being true. The house that we live in is over 100 years old, so for all I know there could be the bones of Charlottetown's Founding Fathers buried in the walls...therefore mice is not that far fetched of an idea.

Life is getting more and more confusing every day. I wish I could pay someone to make the right decisons for me. I'll explain another day, but I will leave you all (and by "all" I mean my one follower) with the knowledge that major decision making is on it's way and it isn't going to be easy.