Today I want to talk about something very near and dear to my heart. There is a movie that was made way back in 1992 and most people don't even know it exists. It is a fantastic silly movie with lots of comedy, fighting and amazing one-liners. Like, AMAZING one-liners.
The reason I am even talking about this is because it was on TV the other night and I could not pass up the opportunity to fall into Nostalgiaville. I texted the one person I know to be as psyched about the movie as I would be, my heterolifepartner, and sat back to enjoy the movie as much as ever. Now I'm not talking about that tv show with that Sarah Michelle girl and...Angel...is it? I'm talking about the classic and ridiculous original movie shot in 1992 featuring a fantastic cast of Kristy Swanson, Luke Perry, Donald Sutherland, Paul Reubens, David Arquette, Hilary Swank...etc. You get my point. Great cast. Sure, most of those people wish to forget that they were ever involved it its production, but that's their own skeletons that they need to deal with.
Before anyone starts to point their finger at me and judge me for loving this movie, (it only got a 5.4/10 on imbd.com), let me explain why I hold this movie in such high regard. First of all, I was 9 years old when it came out so the memory of watching it goes so far back into my memory that I can barely remember a time before it. Second, Luke Perry is adorable in it. Third, it's incredibly cheesy and the plot is easy to follow. Buffy, the blond airhead cheerleader is "the chosen one" who's destiny is to rid the world of vampires and she is to be trained and guided by Merrick, who's destiny is to train the slayer to end the vampire race. Toss in some fighting, dancing, fake blood, an arm amputation, over-the-top costumes and a script that oozes cheese, and I am reliving my childhood over and over again. Fourth, the one-liners and memorable quotes.
Vampire - "Now, I am God!" Pike stakes him - "Now, you're a coat rack"
"Get out of my facial"
"Pike isn't a name, it's a fish."
"He says I have no sense of history. I have no sense of history? He wears a brown tie!"
"Got any gum?"
Buffy - "It's a stupid dance full of stupid people I see every stupid day!" Nicole - "So now we're like...stupid?"
"It's so five minutes ago!"
"All I want to do, it graduate from high school, move to Europe, marry Christian Slater and die. Now it may not sound too great to a sconehead like you but I think it's swell."
"God, what's your damage?
"Does the word 'duh' mean anything to you?"
"You ruined my new jacket. Kill him a lot!"
"I know that guy. THAT is a bad guy, can we go now please?"
"Shuh, like we care?" "Yeah...boo hoo!"
What I love about this movie is that it was just a simple movie that was not meant to be taken seriously. I have never watched any of the Buffy series that was on TV and I really have no true or good reason as to why. I think I was put off by the fact that it was so dark and seemed so severe when the Buffy I know and love was corny and none of it was to be taken seriously at all. Plus, there seems to be 2 kinds of people in the world and I am proud to be part of one of those groups. The first is people who love the movie (me) and the second is those who hate it or think it's stupid. I love that those who love it love it sooo much! We're hardcore about our love. I think that those who are not fans saw the series before and could not appreciate the simplicity of the movie or the cast of people involved. Or they're just too dark and serious for their own good.
Plus Kristy Swanson is way hotter than Sarah Michelle Gellar. Just sayin!